Hump Day
by BookReads28
Summary: Bella's day is not going so well. Then Edward steps in to show her there's more to love about Hump Day. One-shot. Rated M for lemons. Enjoy!


**HI GUYS! Welcome to my new little story! This is just a one-shot that I had had in my mind for a few months and because of how much I love Twilight and it's characters, I decided to write this in their world. This IS rated M because there's some citrusy goodness at the end and Bella is rather...abrasive ;). Also, just to be clear, this story is a romance, but I really wanted Bella to shine in this so Edward is sadly...not in EVERY part of this one-shot. I hope you enjoy my story. This is _Hump Day_.**

 **All of these characters belong to the great Stephanie Meyer, I just use them as my puppets.**

 _I fucking hate Wednesdays._

 _I know. You're thinking... "How can she hate Wednesdays? It means the week is almost over."_

 _While that may be true, it doesn't stop me from loathing them._

 _Now, I haven't always hated Hump Day._

 _It was just that this particular one was the shittiest of all the 1,2024 Wednesdays I had lived through and so I deemed myself a Wednesday hater._

 _I can't complain too much, though._

 _My husband is going to read this and I don't need him to pout for an entire week because I didn't mention how my life was also turned upside down by that specific Hump Day._

 _See, as crappy as that Wednesday was those years ago was, I also met the love of my life and the reason I didn't go to prison for murdering 4 people that day._

 _Yeah...I really hate Wednesdays._

 _It all started like this..._

I woke up at 3:30 in the morning.

No. I didn't wake up that early on purpose, I'm not a fucking moron.

I just figured it was time for me to finally except that I wasn't going to be able to go to sleep anytime soon. With my nostrils closing off my supply of air and my lungs trying to expel themselves from my body, a girl couldn't catch any decent Zzzs.

So, at 4 in the morning I marched down to Wallgreens in search of some strong drugs.

I walked into the store and was immediately irritated by the chime above my head. In other circumstances I would have taken the time to flick off the bell, but today, I was a woman on a mission.

I drudged over to the pharmacy and slammed my hand down onto the counter, waking up the kid behind it who didn't look like he was qualified to be giving out hardcore drugs.

"Uh hi!" He says rubbing his eyes. "How can I help you?"

I rolled my eyes at him. "I need some drugs."

"Drugs?" He gives me a dumb look that makes me want to rip his crooked glasses off and shove them up his dick.

"Yes, drugs. My head hurts, my nose is a constant state of wetness to where other parts of my body are jealous, my lungs are evil, and I'm cold...like all the time." I cross my arms, "You need to help me with that."

He clears his throat uncomfortably as I start tapping my foot. "Well unless you have a prescription, I can't really help you. I suggest you go to aisle number 4, they have-"

I held up my hand and interrupted him. "No, I can't take that. It doesn't work like prescription stuff does."

I realize that I might have been slightly delusional. Sickness can do that to a person, but what he said next was uncalled for and I should not be held accountable for my actions.

"Listen lady," he said as his face hardened, "I can't give you prescription medication without a note from your doctor. So either go home or get out of my face."

Now, I usually don't act this much like a cat in the wild, but I didn't feel well. How would _you_ like it if you had the sniffles and had to deal with Mr. Dickforbrains at 4 in the morning?

The exact way that I did, that's how.

I lunged across the counter in a surprisingly graceful manner, (as I saw later that evening when I watched the surveillance tape).

He was startled and flew back before I could grab him. He fell off of his chair and landed on a tray, making all the medicines on it, scatter.

The sound of the bottles brought me back to my senses and I scurried off the counter. I ran to find the nearest box of Musinex and high tailed it out of there.

After I payed of course. I might be crazy, but I'm no thief.

I ran all the way home thinking that the police were going to be right behind me any second and threw myself on my couch the minute I got to my apartment.

I took medicine and went back to sleep, hoping to hide from my mortification.

 **(...)**

Going to work in the morning after 4 1/2 hours of sleep was not something one would call a good time.

The minute I sat down at my desk and took a deep breath, my name was being screamed from four offices over.

James. That fucker.

I walked calmly into his office and stopped him midway through another bellow.

"BELL- ah hi Bella, glad you could be prompt." He said sarcastically.

"What do you want, James." I said rudely.

He chuckles lightly and shakes his head, "Damn Bella you're such a bitch."

This is one of the reasons why I love my job. James is a no bullshit kind of dude. He doesn't want people to be fake so he doesn't demand any respect.

And I fucking hate him, so I make sure he knows it.

Everyday.

He gets me back for it though.

Like right now.

"I have a great job for you today, Swan."

I get butterflies in my stomach in anticipation for another writing job.

Being a starving artist/writer

sucks, and when you get little opportunities like this, they mean the world.

"I need you to go get me a coffee. Vanilla Bean frapuccino. No whipped cream. Ask them if they can put chocolate on top. Be sure to be prompt." He waves me away.

Cocksucker with his pansy ass coffee order. A vanilla bean frapuccino is _not_ coffee!

I get to Starbucks in a shitty mood. Not like my mood before was any better though.

When I finally get to the cashiers counter after standing in the long ass line, I start reciting my order when someone taps my shoulder.

"Excuse me. I was in front of you."

I turn around ready to punch a bitch when I see the most beautifully beautiful man on the planet. I don't really need to explain how hot this man is. All I need to say is that he's got green eyes and and a jaw that screams "I fuck really well."

I mean seriously, I thought about touching it, but I could almost feel the cut on my finger. Kinda like that sword from Kung Fo Panda.

I must have been staring at him like an idiot because he cleared his throat.

I blushed lightly and averted my eyes.

"Um. Sorry. I-I didn't see you. Do you want to get in front of me?"

I stammered.

What was this shit? Bella Swan takes no prisoners! She carries the balls of her enemies in a leather pouch in her purse. Who was this mass of hormones this man had made me into?

He smiled and I wanted to jump him in the middle of the coffee shop.

"No, that's fine. You look like you could use it more than me."

Wait what?

Did he just say I looked tired?

Of course I was, but you don't have to point it out!

I narrowed my eyes at him and was going to give him a piece of my mind when I was called to get my order.

I quickly turned around, grabbed my drinks and power walked out of there hoping to get Mr. FuckMe out of my mind.

Only to be rammed into by a blonde bimbo. And not the fun kind of ramming either.

My hot Flat White spilled down my shirt, burning my nipples, and _not_ in the sexy way. James' fucking girly drink immediately went into my face and reminded me that I forgot to get his drink without whipped cream.

I'm pretty sure I was saying every curse word under the sun by this point, and matters weren't getting any better when I looked up and Blondie was...gone.

"Fucking fucker fuckity fuck. Shit on a fucking rock and die asshole. I hope you get Nair put in your shampoo and your hair never grows back."

I mumbled to myself as I walked back into Starbucks to get more drinks, because if I come back empty handed, James won't be happy.

I hear a chuckle from behind me as I get back in line.

"You're back."

I turn around to the sound of Mr. FuckMe's voice.

"Thanks for your observation," I say snidely.

"Can I ask you a question?" He asked with a smile in his voice.

I raise my bitch eyebrow in response and when he doesn't say anything, it goes even farther up.

"Well?" I snap, "Are you going to continue to waste my time or get on with it?"

He smiled ignoring my bitchiness, "Oh, the question was implied. I say 'You're back' and you say, 'Well, kind and handsome sir, I'm back because..."

He said leaning forward with a teasing grin.

I looked at him blandly, "What do you _think_ happened?"

He looks me up and down in a manner that makes my tummy turn in a weird way. "Well, unless you went to your house to quick change into a coffee stained shirt and rubbed whipped cream onto your chin...I'm thinking you have a kinky coffee fetish." He said smartly.

I let myself chuckle slightly, surprised.

"You're snarky. I like it."

He smiled at her and held out his hand. "Edward Cullen. I like long walks on the beach and girls with coffee covered chests."

Damn, straight to the point I see.

"Bella Swan. I like beer and chocolate ice cream...and hot guys in coffee shops aren't that bad either." I said feeling bold.

Edward gasps, "You met another hot guy in a coffee shop today? Damn girl, you were only gone for two seconds."

I shrug and turn to face the counter, "I work fast," I say, trying to be nonchalant.

After I give her my order...again, I turn around only to find that Edward isn't behind me anymore and I immediately want to slap myself for allowing a sad feeling to gnaw at my stomach.

I go over to where the barista pointed out the chocolate syrup and remove the top to James' coffee cup.

"What in God's name is _that?_ " Edward's voice says from behind me causing me to jump slightly.

"What the shit? How did you-?"

He cuts me off.

"I walked."

I kind of just look at him for a moment before I turn back around to continue my syruping.

He resumes talking, "What is 'what the shit'?"

I shrug. "Something I made up. Plus, I'm trying to cut back on my swearing."

He laughed loudly behind me and I can almost feel his chest vibrating. "Yeah, we both know that's not true."

I turned around and pointed one of the coffee stirrers at his chest. "Hey dude. Today has been a really shity one. I almost killed an incompetent pharmacist, my dumb boss, and the blonde fucktart from outside."

Edward raised his eyebrow and chuckled "You're cutting back on cussing huh?"

"Oh whatever. You bring out the worst in me!" I accused.

His eyes grew wide with amusement. "Me? What did I do?"

I turned away from him to finish James' drink.

"Stupid handsome, studly men. Just wanna go home and take a nap." I mumbled quietly to myself.

Apparently I wasn't too quiet.

Edward practically howls behind me in laughter. "How is this _my_ fault? We just met and I've done nothing but make you laugh, if I do say so myself."

I could feel my cheeks heat up with my blush.

"W-well, I'm just having a bad day."

I turn to see Edward's smile and eyes soften as he looks at me and it does something to my stomach.

"What?" I ask self consciously.

"Nothing, I've just now come to realize that you...are kind of adorable."

He says with a smirk, as if he knew that would irritate me.

I had to hold myself back from stomping my foot.

"I am _not_ adorable. I am-,"

"Your blush says otherwise." Edward interrupts.

I roll my eyes, "Yeah well it's not like I do it on purpose. It's like an involuntary boner." I shrug, "It just happens."

I expected a more dramatic response from him than just an eyebrow raise at the mention of a boner, but then again, this dude didn't seem to be lacking in the weirdness department.

"Well, I don't know much about boner blushing, but I do think that I would like to see it again." He shot me a smile that had my panties screaming at me for water boarding them.

"I would too, but it appears that duty calls and I'm already super fucking late with my bosses coffee as is. So...rain check?" I said hopefully. I was surprised at myself, I _actually_ wanted to spend time with this sexy stranger.

He nods slowly, "Well I guess you should be on your way. I had fun, this 3 minutes was...interesting."

I chuckled, "It really was. You were like a little rainbow in the sky of my shitty day." What am I? A poet?

He beams at mean nearly blinding me and making me see white dots. "Bye Bella. I hope to see you soon."

I left and power walked back to the office.

It was on the elevator up to my office that I realized neither Edward nor I had exchanged phone numbers.

Fuck.

Well that goes my good mood.

Not even bothering to knock first, I walked into James' office.

"You're late." He stated.

"'Tis true, Jamie boy. 'Tis true. Look at you being all observant."

I praised sarcastically.

He looks at me with his creepy eyes while he strokes his pony tail.

I cringe internally at the thought of James stroking...well, anything.

"You're really in a bitchy mood today aren't you, Bella."

I stuck out my lip. "Aw. But Jamie, I'm on my period. I can't control my emotions these days. You know how it is."

I watched on with complete satisfaction when his face scrunched up at the thought of girly issues.

"You know I don't enjoy speaking of those things, Isabella." He said stiffly.

I chuckled.

"Because you refuse to acknowledge that your vag is probably bigger than mine."

James sputtered for a few seconds and seemed to be at a loss at what to say.

"Isabella! That is highly inappropriate! Get out of my office!"

I smirked as I strutted out of the room.

Damn I'm good.

I managed to get a little work done. I rearranged some of James' meetings, told off a few people on the phone. You know, the usual.

It was around 1:30 when I decided I was tired of hearing the strange noises escaping my stomach so I decided to go ask James what he wanted to eat because the last time I left for lunch and came back without anything for him, he threw a hissy fit of epic proportions.

I knocked once and walked in without waiting for a response.

"Hey James what do you want for- OH MY GOD!" I screamed and threw my hands over my eyes.

"Bella!"

"PUT IT AWAY!"

"Well look who just barged in?" James asks with a chuckle.

"ALL QUESTIONS WILL BE ANSWERED WHEN YOUR CHEETO PUFF IS PLACED BACK IN THE BAG!"

"Huh?"

"YOUR TALLEWACKER!"

"My what?" He asked still chuckling .

Human Resources will be hearing about this very soon, I am traumatized.

"YOUR DICK! PUT YOUR DICK AWAY, IT KEEPS WAVING AT ME!"

I screamed, waving my hands around while squeezing my eyes shut to the point of pain.

James just laughed and I heard rustling around and the the sound of a zipper.

I waited a few seconds before peeking my eyes open just a little, before removing my hand.

To see that James was standing about a foot away from me with a creepy grin on his face.

"Well well well. Swan if I didn't know any better, I'd say you barged in here on purpose." He licks his chapped lips and I almost want to offer him some chap stick.

"Why the fuck would I want to see your little rolley polley? I just wanted to know what you wanted for lunch!"

He stepped closer until my back was pressed against the door. I was starting to get a wee bit freaked out.

"How about you have me for lunch," he leered, his dick breath spreading across my face.

And before I could respond, this cocksucker put his dirty, decrepit, STD infested mouth on mine.

So I broke his dick.

Not literally, I'm not really sure if that's possible. But, I'm pretty sure I heard a pop when I grabbed his dick over his pants and twisted. Hard.

"YOU BITCH!" He screamed while curling into the fetal position to cradle his twisted appendage.

"THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU FORCE YOUR CRUSTY SELF ON A ME!" I screamed kicking him in his boney ass for good measure.

"YOU'RE FIRED!" He roaredz

"YOU CAN'T FIRE ME YOU USELESS CUNT! BECAUSE I QUIT!"

I yell running into my office and grabbing all my shit.

Walking onto the street I took a deep breath and let out a loud laugh. I had no job and it could be very hard to find another job, but I was free from James and that was enough to warrant a trip to my favorite restaurant.

Emmett's had been open for about 3 years and when I first tasted their food, I found heaven. Their fried chicken and mashed potatoes with extra...extra gravy.

Walking into Emmett's I took deep breath to breathe in the aroma of fried, greasy things.

"BELLS!" Booms a voice from the back.

Emmett Cullen, a bear of a man, comes running around the corner and grabs me in a large hug.

"Bella! How've you been? I haven't seen you around in a few days!"

Did I mention I come to Emmett's every day?

"Yeah I've just been busy."

Lies, I just don't want to get fat from all the deliciously fried food, so I figured a few days away would do some good.

"Well you're just in time. I just took some chicken out of the fryer. I also have some people I want you to meet." He spoke quickly while pulling me to a booth with a few people in it.

"Okay, Bella I'd like you to meet my brother and my girlfriend. This is Rose," he said gesturing to the beautiful blonde across the booth. And she looked way too familiar

"You!" I gasped and pointed at her as her eyes widened and looked slightly frightened.

"You're the girl that ran into me and made me waste hot coffee on my nipples. And in case you were wondering, I _didn't_ enjoy it!" I yelled.

Rose looked contrite and opened her mouth to speak when she was interrupted by a familiar voice.

"So does that mean you _usually_ enjoy having hot nipples?"

I quickly turned to the voice, but whatever retort I had died when I saw who was sitting there.

I smirked, "Well Hot Coffee Dude, wouldn't you like to know?"

"Well obviously, that's why I asked." He said with a raised eyebrow.

"From time to time I enjoy some nipple play. Pinching, sucking, licking...clamping. Never hot nipple play though, I'm not into pain."

I said staring him down, daring him to keep up the banter.

The smile Edward gives me could literally cut through my panties and carry them away. And he knew it.

"I'll be sure to remember that."

I gave him the brow. "And why is that any of _your_ business?" I'll play coy for now.

"Because i'll be needing those tips at some point."

Niagara. Freakin. Falls.

"That's mighty presumptuous of you."

He smiles showing his pearly whites.

"It's presumptuous of me to assume we would have some really hot sex? I did ask you out on a date after all."

I chuckled, trying to cover up my secret horniness. "First off, since when does one date constitute us having sex? And second, you didn't even get my number."

"When the chemistry is this good after one meeting, I think I can assume good sex is to follow." He said shrugging.

"And to the second point?" I asked, flustered from his previous response.

"Google."

"Okay!" Emmett says behind me.

"I think I've seen enough sexual banter for the rest of my life, especially because half of the conversation is my brother. Gross. So I'm gonna go make Bella's food. You guys chat, I'll be back."

Rose cleared her throat. "So I'm um, guessing you two know each other?" She asked timidly.

"Vaguely."

"She's gonna be my baby momma."

Edward and I said together.

Rose and I stared at Edward while I tried to calm my racing heart.

"What?" He asked with a smirk, "Too soon?"

I blushed, what is up with this guy making me blush? "Just a little," I said trying and failing not to hide my smile.

"So you guys are dating?" Rose questioned.

"No," I answered, "We met this morning at a coffee shop." I narrowed my eyes at her, "Speaking of..."

She frowned, "I'm so sorry! I was just in a rush and you looked _so_ angry so I thought it would be best if I just ran away." She said putting her face in her hands.

Edward nudged me, "Your angry face is kind of intimidating."

I nodded sagely. My bitch face _was_ the best.

I decided to take pity on her.

"It's alright Rapunzel, we all have our bad days. Mine, just happen to be days that end with Y because my stupid fucktard of a boss drove me to the brink of insanity. Every. Single. Day." I took a deep breath to calm myself because I was getting a little flustered and Blondie looked a little scared. I smiled, "It's fine though because I quit about 30 minutes ago."

"You what?" Edward said while choking on his beer. "Why did you quit?"

I looked at him dumbly, "Because my boss tried to show me his micro-penis."

"I hope you chopped it off and glued it to his forehead!" Rose exclaimed loudly.

Edward and I turned to look at her with astonishment.

"Umm," she cleared her throat, "Metaphorically of course."

Edward turned to me, "What she said."

I rolled my eyes, "Yes, I gave him shit for it, but I was just done in general. I have enough money saved that I can live on stress free for a few months without having to worry about working."

Edward nodded. "That's good."

"Yeah it is." I stood up and slapped my hands against the booth. "Kay I gotta piss, if Emmett comes back, don't let him eat my food."

My Green Eyed God smiled back at me making me teeter a little.

"I promise I won't let him touch your food."

I got out of the booth quickly and was about to make my way to the restrooms while Emmett's loud voice filled the diner.

"Bells I got your food! It's hot and- shit! Oh shit! Oh shit! Oh shit!"

The next thing I know a large body is slamming into me, I'm falling to the floor and there's a loud crunching sound coming from my arm.

"MOTHERFUCKER THAT HURTS!"

"Bella!" I hear Emmett and Edward both yell before I'm being enveloped into strong arms.

I take one look at my wrist and I can tell it's broken...well that and it feels like my bones are melting. That too.

"What the fuck Emmett!" Edward yells.

"I'm sorry! I didn't see the wet floor sign, I slipped!" Emmett yelled back.

I look around me at the mess and then at my mangled wrist.

And start balling.

Edward immediately grabs me in his arms and hoists me up. "It's ok baby I know it hurts. We're going to the hospital right now."

"It's not that!" I bawl.

"Then what is it? What else hurts?"

I gesture to the mess Emmett made. "My fried chicken is ruined!"

 **(...)**

I lean my head on Edward's firm shoulder while I give him information to write on my chart.

Damn he is one fine specimen.

I feel him chuckle. "Why thank you, I'm flattered."

Dammit! I said that out loud?

"Yes you did," he said, laughing again.

Then he shook his head, "I still can't believe you actually cried about your wasted food."

I raise an eyebrow, "Have you ever had your brother's fried chicken?"

He shook his head no.

I sighed in sadness for him. "You really don't know what you're missing."

Edward looked down at me with a gentle look in his eye that made my chest tight.

Ok ok, and my panties too.

"You are such a little weirdo."

I smile up at him, "You don't mind though."

"I sure don't," he said softly.

"Isabella Swan?" I look up to see a nurse waiting for me.

I loop my arm through Edward's and start walking, giving him no chance of leaving.

Edward held my hand as I sat down on the crinkly paper.

"You seem awfully calm."

I chuckled, "I am. When you've been in and out of this place as much as I have, you get used to it."

His grip on my hand tightened and he got this cute little wrinkle in between his eyebrows.

"You're injured a lot?" He asked worriedly.

So cute.

I sighed, "Yes, unfortunately I am not as graceful as some would believe."

Edward chuckles, "And this led to multiple trips to the ER?"

"Yep. Dad's insurance was probably most of my college tuition," I laughed.

There was a knock on the door and a 30 something man who seemed to be on the verge of balding, stood there looking shaky.

I leaned over to whisper in Edward's ear. "I'm not sure I trust him to be giving me medical advice."

Edward attempted to cover up a snicker by shushing me.

"H-hi I'm Dr. Newton. I will be checking out your hand correct?"

The jittery man said while talking to my breasts.

Edward quickly whispered in my ear. "You're right. We should get another doctor."

 **(...)**

Once the Boob Doc had decided that I _did_ in fact have a broken wrist, (seriously I could be a better doctor than that dufus) he put me in a cast and sent me on my merry way.

Edward and I were walking towards the exit and admiring my kick ass bright green cast, when a slimy voice called out to me.

"Well if it isn't my whore of an assistant."

I slowly turn around to find James sneering at me while holding a bag of ice to his junk.

Edward immediately nudged me behind him.

James grimaced, "Oh look. You got your little boyfriend fighting your battles."

I peak of Edward's shoulder. "Uh last time I checked, there wasn't anyone else in the room when I mangled your little cheeto puff of a wiener!" I yelled.

James turned purple. Aw, I had outed him to the whole waiting room. "You little bitch! You broke my dick!"

"Good. You shouldn't be allowed to procreate anyway."

He started to move towards me with a with I assume was supposed to be an intimidating glare.

Edward, who had been observing our conversation quietly, wasn't having that. He quickly pushed James away from us and then junk punched him harder that I had.

He was sprawled put on the floor in seconds.

I think that's the exact moment that I fell in love with Edward Cullen.

He quickly grabbed my hand and dragged me out of the hospital before either of us could be escorted out by security.

We sat silently in his car for about a minute before I reached across the armrest to devour his face.

It took him a minute to respond, but when he did, oh boy.

The man certainly knew how to kiss.

I broke away breathlessly.

"That was so fucking hot."

Edward laughed loudly showing off his dimples. "I'm glad you thought so," he said grabbing my hand and resting it on his knee.

"So," he said quietly, "It's about to start getting dark. Would you like to get some dinner with me? You've got to be hungry after Emmett destroyed your food."

I smiled at him. A beautiful boy that was willing to feed me. He's the best.

"Sure."

Walking into Olive Garden was when I decided that I was dragging Edward back home with me.

What? He likes food almost as much as I do.

It's a deal breaker.

We talked for hours and I learned about his job as a Marine Biologist, his crazy family, his love of comic books, food, and all things Teen Titans.

I was completely lost for this man and it hadn't even been 12 hours.

While sharing dessert, Edward and I were in the middle of a Starfire vs. Raven debate, when Charlie, my dad, called.

"Hey daddio, what's up?"

Charlie cleared his throat, "Uh Bells, I'm going to need you to come to the station tonight, I have something I need to talk to you about."

I immediately hung up and panicked, scaring Edward when I yelled that he needed to take me to the police station immediately. Dad never liked it when I was at the station, he said it was no place for ladies. So him calling me directly to there and not just telling me over the phone, alerted me.

The ride to the station was tense and the silence was filled with the sound of my tapping foot and Edward's reassuring words.

When Edward had parked the car I quickly jumped out and ran into the building looking for Charlie.

I saw him staring at his computer with an odd look on his face.

"Charlie!" I called out of breath. "What happened?"

I felt Edward come up behind me and place his hand on my shoulder.

"Uh kiddo. Does the name Ron Parish ring a bell?" Charlie asks me.

I rack my brain, "No, that doesn't sound familiar."

Charlie chuckles, but tries to hide it with a cough.

"Well he knows you, and I had to convince him not to press charges on you."

Now I was really confused.

"Dad I have no idea what you're talking about I- oh."

I was cut off by Charlie turning his computer screen around so that I could see video surveillance footage from the inside of a Wallgreens. The exact Wallgreens that I happened upon just this morning. Seeing oneself fly across a counter does change your perspective on some things.

"Yeah oh. Care to explain?" He said, his mustache twitching.

I could feel Edward trying to hold in his chuckles behind me.

"I was sick and tired and he was being a total douche."

Charlie raised a brow, "He said you were screaming about wanting prescription drugs?"

"Musinex doesn't work as well as the strong stuff." I mumbled.

Dad sighed and leaned back in his chair.

"Well I just thought you would like to see the video...and maybe this could teach you a lesson?"

I rolled my eyes, "Ok. Sure Dad. Don't threaten people and don't fly across counters. Listen I'm tired, so I'm just gonna head home." I said walking towards the exit wanted to be as close to my home...and Edward as I could.

He cleared his throat. "Bells are you gonna introduce me to this young man?"

"He's your future son in-law," I called over my shoulder and kept on walking.

 **(...)**

"Bella," Edward murmured breathlessly into my ear, "We should probably stop. I mean you just broke your wrist."

I broke away from him, "If you think I'm going any longer without having you inside me you better rethink that."

I had brought Edward back to my house with every intention of getting into his pants. He just didn't know that yet.

He immediately grabbed me and carried me to the bedroom.

My clothes were off and he was sucking on every inch of skin he could get to. He gave my nipples extra attention and had me mewling like a dog in heat.

"Too many clothes," I whimpered as I pulled his shirt over his head and his shorts and boxers off of his legs.

God he had a pretty cock.

I had seen a few cocks in my day but this one...this one was a thing of beauty.

Edward hovered over me poised at my entrance and I could feel him slipping over my clit.

"Are you sure?" He asked with his heavy breath.

"Yes," I breathed and that was the last coherent thing I said that night.

He entered me sharply dragging a moan from the back of my throat. He pulled me closer to him while i raked my fingernails over his back while he hissed.

He pounded into me with deep, heavy thrusts until I was nothing but a pile of pleasure and bones.

Later on, after about 2 more rounds, I was laying on Edward's chest while he played with my hair.

"Bella?" He whispered.

"Hmm?" I nuzzled closer to his skin.

"You know what you said to your dad...about me being his future son-in-law. Did you mean that?" He asked quietly.

"Well, I was about 99.9% sure when I said it. But after that performance...and the multiple encores. I think I'm completely on board."

He sighed, "Good." And then burried his face in my hair.

I shot up to give him an incredulous look, "Really? No resistance at all. You're just going to accept that we're getting married one day?"

"Yup," and then he promptly fell asleep.

 _And we lived happily ever after._

 _No, really we did._

 _Things ended up going a lot faster than we had planned, but we were okay with that._

 _We were a couple of dumbasses that forgot condoms and surprise!_

 _Baby Cullen was on its way._

 _I was in labor with Anya for 25 hours, want to guess which day 24 of them were spent on._

 _A fucking Wednesday._

 _Ever since that day, I've only gotten sick on Wednesdays, only had PMS on Wednesdays and only just flat out wanted to kill people, on Wednesdays._

 _But...there's one hump day that I can forgive. And that's the day I met Edward. Yes, the rest of the day was shitty as hell, but I wouldn't trade him for anything._

 **Thank You for reading.  
Go check out my other Percy Jackson story, _Layers._**


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